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Anvil reveals more details on the Hurrican

3/3/2017

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Yesterday Anvil Aerospace was scheduled to give out some additional detail on their Hurricane release. As many other news outlets The Monocle Times did submit a catalog of questions to Anvil in the hope to give our readers some more clarity on this ship. And a newspaper worth it's money (and hell we're worth our money!) we did ask the tough questions, the kind of questions Anvil would probably rather avoid.

And they did.

So before diving into what Anvil told us about the new Hurricane, lets talk about what they didn't tell us and get a bit into the why. As you can expect, despite Anvils reluctentness to come forward on those issue we did spare no expense to find an answer to you.

Will there be a platinum plated model?

Based on Anvils silence, no there wont be. However we did contact a few after market shops specializing in luxury vehicles and they confirmed that aside any technical issues surfacing after the final production they would gladly coat a Hurricane with a platinum finish.

Will it be possible to remove the ejection seat to make space for more important components such as an additional power plant?

As Anvil clearly fails to see how cheap pilots are they keep insisting on wasting space with ejection seats. To find an answer to this we contracted five reputable engineers that have worked in the avionics industry for years (and yet have shockingly cheap rates) to examine existing Anvil designs such as the Gladiator and tell us how feasible it is to replace the ejection seats with additional power generators.

Four of the engineers were unanimous on the fact that the ejection system so deeply embedded in the design that, no you can not replace it. The fifth told us "What the fuck is wrong with you?" and hung up, and subsequently was sued for breach of contract.

Will there be a wooden interior option for the Hurricane?

Again Anvil did not give us any details on this matter, however we let loose our four trusted engineers on the issue, again examining the current Gladiator design to come up with an answer to this question.

To no surprise they all came to the same conclusion, while some wood plating might be possible anything more will have a severe impact on the structural integrity of the ship. After pressed what that is supposed to mean they simplified the matter to "It would go boom".

Is the Hurricane capable of carrier operations?

This is a bit harder to answer but our trusty team of non sued engineers came up with what they call "a decent guess" adding quickly "but don't sue us over it the UEE holding back information makes this hard to tell!".

We mostly know that UEE certifies their carriers for the F7C/-M and the F7A, the Hurricane's dimension so come extremely close to those ships so it is quite possible that the Hurricane will be capable of operating form a carrier craft.

What Anvil did say

While we did originally intend not to echo the marketing material of Anvil after all of our questions being rejected, one of our readers who would prefer to stay anonymous so we will just call him 'SharpRifle' here, (what a stupid alias, I would have expected better from our readership, like 'GoldenSpoon' or 'ShinyEbony' hell even 'EdgyDiamond'), asked us to at least give a short summary so here it goes, The official Anvil Hurricane in one sentence:

Ship that can't fly very far with lots of guns that, more so on a possibly slave turret, that operates best in packs performing hit and run tactics but sone stupid engineer did a too weak power plant in it.

by Sir Quentin Reginald Watson
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